Just a thought

Has humans felt the need to oppose God's will and order of things ever since the temptation of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden? Is that the reason why women have felt the need to dress and behave like men?

"No one and nothing* should have the power over me! I should be free to try everything and decide for my self how to live my life. Anyone not free to do this, has her human rights restrained, and must be freed!"

*Applying to God, my husband/father, moral, faith, etc. Failing to recognize the power the fashion industry have over people...

That's why Muslims covering according to their tradition/faith are seen as oppressed, and in need of society's helping hand to free them. And why women working part-time is a bad thing, because the no. one want for a woman should be to work full time. The maternity leave should be divided evenly between the parents, giving both mother and father 6 months at home with the baby. The housework is also to be divided evenly between the man and woman, not acknowledging that most women tend to see more things to be done at home than does the man... I wonder why?

I disapprove of this evenly division of everything between the sexes... I think we're created differently for a reason, and that we do have different qualities that should be appreciated to the same extent.

Afraid of Christianity!

Read in the newspaper that in a new textbook, to be used in a subject called Religion and Ethics, for the Norwegian primary, or was it secondary, school the notions B.C and A.D. are replaced by something like After Ordinary Time counting (AOT) (bad translation), being religion neutral!

I think this is just stupid! The notions have been used since forever, and now the textbook authors have to make up a new notion simply because the book should be neutral to all religions.

Its a main tendency in Norway, to remove all references to religion from the public space and becoming neutral. I can’t see why that’s so important! Norway’s been a Christian country since 1030 AD, and why do we need to remove that reference from peoples’ everyday lives and make it something for the history interested. If any of our immigrants are troubled by Norway being a Christian country, they need to adjust themselves, or go somewhere else. But I don’t think it’s the immigrants that complains, I think it’s secular people around in various leading positions, trying to remove the Christian faith and all its references, because religion doesn’t mean anything to them.

Norwegians doesn’t seem to need a God to believe in. One’s satisfied with oneself and ones’ life, and if not, its only one person who can fix it, and that’s oneself! It’s a very self oriented society, where the aims are to realize ones utmost potentials, taking less care of hurting someone or sacrificing someone in the process.

I don’t like it nor do I approve of it. Although we have a lot of benefits in this country, we’re at the top, or among the top) of the countries when it comes to suicides and depressions. That’s a warning signal of a cold and harsh society!

Why niqab?

Some weeks ago I saw two women wearing all black, like in this picture, even black gloves, and it made me wonder why they do. I felt sorry for them, as I saw their dress as a prison. I can’t understand why it is necessary for a woman to cover herself this much, as though she’s trying to be invisible! I can’t see how that’s liberating to the woman.

I’ve done some internet searching and found an answer to the niqab question. I suppose that muslimahs around the world disagree upon the need to use niqab or simply the hijab, as they disagree about a lot of other hijab issues. (Hijab both in the sense of the veil and in the sense of modest clothing.)

In general muslim women should wear modest clothes, not drawing attention to their appearance or body. It seems as though most think that a veil covering the hair and neck, is needed in order to complete the modest attire. See explanation below.

Syed maintains that when a woman is covered, men cannot judge her by her appearance but are forced to evaluate her by her personality, character, and morals. “I tell them that the hijab is not a responsibility, it’s a right given to me by my Creator who knows us best. It’s a benefit to me, so why not? It’s something every woman should strive to get and should want.”

The young woman admits to being surprised that many people wonder if she wears the hijab everywhere (at home, when sleeping, in the shower). The truth is that Muslim women only cover themselves in front of men who are not direct relatives (brothers, fathers, and uncles) to prevent indecent acts or thoughts. (From “Why do Muslim women wear the hijab?” Eighteen year old Canadian Muslimah Sumayyah Syed explains.)

I’ve also read that the Prophet Muhammad explains the covering of women as a mean of protecting what is beatiful. I can’t recall the exact words, but it had something to do with hiding ones gems/pearls. It was in fact a beatiful sentence/excerpt.

According to Al-Muhajabah (meaning she who wears Islamic dress) niqab (see picture with woman in black) is an even better way of seeking to obtain the love of Allah. It is a prolonging of the hijab, covering even more, and harder to wear etc All this resulting in niqab being even better than hijab in means of keeping private what is meant to be private. She states that there’s not an explicit reference to niqab in the Quran, but makes reference to some other text and the fact that the Prophet’s wifes surely wore niqab. (For a full understanding and explanation, visit the www.muhajabah.com pages)

To me a niqab still looks as a prison for women, but now I know why someone choose this.

Bristol Palin (a good role model)

First of all I’d like to say that it’s strange for a foreigner following the US presidential election from the outside, how much of the presidential and vice-presidential candidates’ personal life and history has to be dug out and scrutinised. I mean, a person seeking presidential (or vice-p.) power can’t go through their lives without hurting anyone or doing any mistakes! I’v read about mr Palin’s drunk driving 22 (!) years ago, about mrs Palin’s past as a beauty contest participant, and of course about Bristol Palin, their unmarried dautghter’s pregnancy.

Of course miss Palin should’ve waited to have sex until she was married, but for some reason she didn’t, and her choice to have the baby and take the responsability of her actions should make her a role model to other unmarried pregnant teen-agers, and their families, who should be supportive and helpful with taking care of the unplanned blessing arriving.

Whether Bristol Palin had chosen to have her baby hadn’t her mother been a VP candidate or high profile pro-life politician, we’ll probably never know. We all do mistakes in our lives, and criticising Bristol Palin and reminding her about how much her teen-age pregnancy has disappointed her parents, that’s, in my opinion, just mean. It’s her mother that has chosen to become a vice-president candidate, not Bristol Palin. Suddenly this young woman is being written about and spoked about all around the country and overseas. She’s used to her mother being the Alaskan governor, but the state isn’t one of the more important states in the US, and thus the governor and her family had remained fairly unknown to the rest of the world up until now. We should all bear in mind, that living with strict moral rules and parents carying very much about the family members’ public apperance and the family’s honor and image, and so on, could make anyone wanting to rebel. Perhaps miss Bristol wanted to rebel against her mother being a super mom - or at least the public image of her being one - taking care of her five children, husband, work, having a baby with Down’s syndrome, etc. (Even I feel a need to rebel against her - no one does everything right! Everyone has some weaknesses and flaws, otherwise they wouldn’t have been human!)

And, take a look at these pictures of miss Palin and her baby brother Trig. She looks so calm, so caring, it’s like the baby’s hers and she’s so happy with it. Of all the pictures I’ve seen at the Internet from this event, mrs Palin holds him only on a couple of the pictures, and while holding him she also checks her Blueberry and speak in her cell phone. Miss Palin, however, seems content about holding and caring for her baby brother. Had I been mrs Palin, I would have carried my beautiful baby son everywhere so that everyone could have seen him and seen how proud I was of him. But the child she’s bringing along is Piper, the 6 yrs old girl. Her larger girls, Willow and Bristol tags along in the background, carrying baby Trig and his stuff.

Mrs Palin appeals to me in many ways, she’s a christian, conservative (however somewhat selective about what to be conservative about), mother of five, pro-life, beautiful yet modest, and so on. (There are also things I don’t agree upon, but I’ll leave them for now - not that it matters, I’m not eligible to vote anyhow.) But, the main thing I dislike about her (based upon my knowledge of her from the media) is that it seems as though baby Trig is in her way. Everyone salutes her for having him despite their knowledge of him having Down’s syndrome, and despite her being the Alaskan governor. But, she returned to work three days after giving birth to him… and now, during this presidential election campaign, how much time will she have to establish the very important bonds between a mother and her child? She’snt even the one carrying him around when greeting people… to me, that’s not right, and it’s signalling that he’s not that important to her… I must confess that a woman, a mother of small children, seeking this much power, that puzzles me… I don’t understand it. I mean, mrs Clinton, she’s a mother, but her daughter’s grown up, and she has only one, I understand her want to become a powerful person. But mrs Palin, no. She’snt finished with mothering being her no. 1 priority, and now she wants to show the world that a mother with small children also can become a vice president. Someone’s going to suffer from this, and I’m afraid it’s the baby and her other children.

This is perhaps her once in a lifetime chance to become something as important as a vice-president, but it’s also her once in a lifetime chance to establish the first important bonds to her little baby son. Choosing her career in stead of her children, that’s not what I would have done. And being a conservative christian, I can’t see how that’s something she would do either.

Homemaker according to God's will

4 that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed. (Titus 2 (New King James Version))

I’m trying to live according to this, but I’ve only just started on this journey of becoming a “Titus 2 woman”. Due to my father being a psycho-/sociopat (what is the difference?) treating me as his servant, over time I built a lot of anger inside me, and I’ve been determined to not let anyone boss me around like he did. This resulted in me letting my husband do all the housework, cooking and so on. I sought to do less than him, afraid of him becoming my household slave master, like my father was, if I showed him that I too could do some housework. But as my husband is in all manners different from my father (except in the fact that they’re both men), I have nothing to fear.

And, in the recent year, I’ve felt as though my husband manages the household so well without me, that there’s no room for me. He’s only doing the housework because he’s kind to me, but I’ve come to think that he’s doing too much. In doing almost all the household chores, he’s pushed me out of my home in some sort. I think that the woman should be the main homemaker, the one responsible for all the household chores, and that the husband can help her by doing some housework delegated to him by the wife. I’ve seen that when my husband is away on business trips, and I’m responsible for all the household in that period, I’m proud of the work I do, and I’m doing what’s right for me. And it gives me more meaning to my life - I’m needed! I have a role to fill, I have tasks to do.

The family is the main component of a society. That’s the Church’s teaching. The man and the wife have both important roles to fill in the family. To me, it’s difficult to understand how so many women with a family can aspire towards personal realisation through work outside of home. Of course, if one is certain that ones home and family doesn’t suffer from the outside work, one can aspire towards having a career. But that would require the woman to be some sort of super-woman, both able to be a mother, wife, homemaker, and career woman. Or, if all the housework is done by someone else, the career thing would be possible. But one still need enough energy to be a mother and a wife. Even though the Churc teaches that a marriage should be open for children, I think that some people should not have kids. It’s better for a couple pursuing their careers and not open for any other priorities, to refrain from having children, than for them to have children that are unhapy because both parents work too much.

I’m a fan of peoples’ right to choose what’s best for one self. I don’t think we should go back to the fifties where only the unmarried, or widowed women worked. But I think that more women should choose part-time work, or even quitting work for a period, in order to devote themselves to their family and children. As not all women are suited to have children, I don’t want it to become an obligation, but I think it should be a different focus in the society. We need to admire the ones devoting themselves to others, in stead of admiring ego-sentric people aspiring towards the fullfilment of their personal goals, not considering the consequences on others.

Miss Headscarf 2008 in Denmark!

I wonder when we’ll see a worldwide competition of this?! Or, perhaps, in the muslim dominated countries, there’s such a thing already? Denmark’s National Broadcaster, Danmarks Radio, has had a Miss Headscarf competition, where any women wearing a headscarf could enter by sending a photo of themselves wearing a headscarf. And here is the winner and the runner ups. Unfortunately, the text is only in Danish, so if you’re having trouble understanding the words, send me a comment and I’ll translate for you. The text showing is the name of the winner and the runner ups and their ages. År=years. And the other text is some fashion experts’ comments about the headscarf. Positive comments about the colours and patterns on the headscarf, and that wearing a headscarf the way these women does, doesn’t make them unstylish.

Josef and Elisabeth F.

This is the worst case of incest abuse I’ve ever heard of! It’s impossble to imagine what could have made this man do such things to his own daughter. He’s clearly a person without any form of empathy. And the various media (TV, newspapers etc) work hard to give us all possible details of this horror history. Why? to sell more of course! If a media soruce is the first one to report some “important” news, that helps build it’s image as a reliable and quick newssource.

Curious about the case, most people read/listen/view a lot in the beginning, then - fed up by all the horrific details, one tunes out and wander off to read/hear/view something else. And the attention is lost.

What makes me extra sad about this, is that following the discovery of such an horror, should be a massive information campaign teaching people how to look for similar cases in their surroundings, and what do to if one suspects incestous actions happening. Who to contact, what to say to the possible victim to ask for the truth etc. This could help reduce the amount of incest or other abuse.

Because of my personal experience with incest I know that “normal” people does these things all around the world. (Of course, not all to this extent.) And the same thing happen everytime; people told about the incest actions of a certain person, doesn’t believe it, because they’ve never seen anything. How long will it take before people start to understand that persons they think are all good and kind, can do evil things? And that abusers often (I’ll say in most cases) are normal people just like one self, and that they hide the abuse very well!? They’re masters of disguising their evil actions, and the victims are masters of hiding the abuse as they feel ashamed and partly guilty. Help from outside is needed.

I’m sure that this Josef F. case in Austria isn’t the only one of this extent and seriousity. It’s just that nobody have talked about them, neither the abuser nor the abuse victim. Please, all victims, talk about your experience, but choose your listeners with care! Talk about it in victim support groups, to your psychologic therapeut, on the Internet… Do not keep silent with your experiences! You’re not helping anyone by keeping silent! (I know, I’ve tried, and I only punished myself!) It’s never your fault!

Obligations

I find myself sometimes still struggling with my obligation to buy less. For example handbags and jewellry. I have to ask myself the question: do I really need this? Then I consider the money - how much good could this amount of money do to a person less fortunate than me? And, wouldn’t this handbag become just another bad buy and pile up in my closet or I have to sell it at the internet for a quarter of the price I paid? And what about the global problem of waste? The more I buy, the more waste I generate.

For some reason it appears as though buying new things is a way of being nice to myself. Whenever I’m feeling somewhat sad or down, spending money on items I really don’t need, have been the main way in which I’ve tried to make me happy again. During the last months, however, it has become clear to me that what makes me happy is not buying new things, but being with my son and my dog. I guess I’ve known this for some thime, but haven’t done anything about it before this lent. My buying stop during lent was really fruitful, and now it’s easier to not buy than buy. Because when thinking about buying an item I really don’t need, I get a bad conscience! And that helps me alot.

My want to contribute to a better world, a world with a more fair ressource distribution, obliges me to do and not do certain things. And though they may feel like a unneccessary sacrifice at the time, I know that it’s the right thing to do. And in the long run it will give me a better conscience. Knowledge should oblige one to act!

The parish priest always emphasise the fact that believing must be followed by action, otherwise one cannot say one believe. That’s a good thing to remember!

Taking control

The hijab-wearing women are often viewed as a person one should feel sorry for. In the “modern” societies of Western Europe and the US, the main thoughts (and the publically correct) are that “She’s probably under control by her husband and/or sons. She’s not free to wear whatever she wants… she’s not allowed to do whatever she wants… she’s forced to wear the hijab and the modest and covering clothes, poor thing…” and so on. And the female fashion in these societies are all about being sexy and using one’s sex appeal. The ideals admired are the supermodels, Hollywood-celebs and the likes. Forcing everyone, except the natural born supermodels, to be on an everlasting diet, excercise regime and even consider plastic surgery in order to keep up with the latest trends.

But what if it is quite the opposite?* What if the modest women, of all faiths and convictions, are actually the liberated ones? Because they (and to some extent me) are not under society’s increasing press and unhealthy focus on beauty and body, choosing to wear covering and modest clothes, not following the fashion trends. Modest women are not controlled by fashion designers who’s obviously allergic to female bodies and at the same time asking for women to show cleavage and legs.

The modest women are in control over their bodies, controlling what parts could be shown public, and what parts should be kept covered. A modest women doesn’t use sex appeal to gain success in her life, but rely on her brain, appearance, inner beauty, personality, and other values. Her body isn’t ”put on display or up for sale”, she doesn’t advertise for herself by showing off her ”goods”. I know what group I’m in and my feeling of liberation is increasing!

As shown in these pictures (left and right) being modest isn’t necessarily different from following the fashion trends in color and materials. Being modest can also mean looking good.

I like this picture (left) very much. It’s from South-East Asia somewhere. It makes me think about which of these women are in control over their body? The muslim or the blond?

In the summer I, personally, wouldn’t have covered to the muslim extent, but I’m more covered than the blonde! I don’t see the blonde as being liberated because she can wear whatever she wants, it’s more like she says that she’s not anxious about her body being on public display… she doesn’t demand respect, she sort of wants to be liked because of her body. What kind of mistaken feminism is that?!

*I don’t doubt that some muslim women, as well as other women, are under too much control by their husbands.

Pains make me afraid... (baby no. 2?)

When in bed with my mucle pains and fever (some sort of flu or infection) last weekend, I began remembering the labour pains. Because the localisation of these pains were largely the same as the pains I head when giving birth. And I thought that I’ll never be able to give birth again, because of the anxitey resulting from having this much pain.

Due to my lack of control over my body when growing up (incest experience) it is very important to me to have control over my body, or at least feel that I have some sort of control. Whenever I experience some sort of pain, ranging from my period to the ultimate pain experience giving birth, I’m filled with anxiety. I’m afraid of the pain in a way I can’t explain. And hence, I don’t understand my reaction.

And, in relation to this, I think a lot about having a second baby. Before last weekend I associated having babies with the joy and excitment of being a part of God’s creation will, and looking at the ultrasound pictures, wondering how this little person inside me is going to be. He’s so close, yet so foreign to me!

But, having rekindled the memory of the labour pains, and especially all the anxiety I had after the birth, I’m in doubt as to whether to have a second baby or not… The question is, am I in a position where I can decide whether to have or not a second baby? There are so many things to consider!

The Church’s teachings

According to the Church’s official teachings, a marriage is a lifelong commitment (it’s actually of such great importance that it’s considered as one of the sacraments) between a man and a women. The marriage is formed to the benefit of the man and the woman, but also to the society. The marriage is the smallest “building cell” of a society. And every marriage must be entered into with an openness to having children. Or receiving the children that God gives the couple, thus taking part in God’s creation will or order. The Church also teaches that the only acceptable form for contraceptives is abstaining. And it is up to the couple to decide the number of children. The children is seen as a gift or blessing from God.

The society’s “teachings”

The main trend in Norway is to have one’s first child at the age of 29-30 (woman) and then having two to three kids. A lot of peoples have their kids fairly close in age, probably because of their starting age and then they want to get done with the kids being small and needy, fairly quickly. Kids are seen as both a good and a blockage thing. It’s seen as normal to have kids, although not everyone’s prepared to make the “sacrifices” one must to cater properly for the kids’ needs. Having been adult without kids for some years (maybe as much as 15 years) one develop certain habits and routines, and a number of new parents find it hard to cut down on clubbing, boys- and girls- outings, and personal fitness programs. It’s not seen as normal to bring one’s children along to all the things the adults does. Going to cafés with a baby is ok, but not if the kid’s passed 1-2 years. Gyms have babysitting facilities, and going to restaurants for dinner, the kid has to be at home or looked after by someone else. In southern Europe this is different, there it is common to see large families having dinner at a restaurant at 20.00 and on, all ages present.

The couple can decide how many kids to have, and the publically correct opinion is that a mother should continue persuing her career and self realisation anyhow. Having children should not block or put one back from these goals. (NB! Being a mother is not seen as a valid self realisation goal.) Having children is just one of the roles and functions a woman has. Along with being a wife and partner, career woman, friend, and so on.

My ”teachings”

To me, being a mother is the most important thing I can be. It has given me a purpose for living. All my past and my future life will be used in order to be the best mother I can be. It is great to have been chosen by God to participate in his creation will/order. He saw me fit to be a mother, and I’m forever grateful.

I’m first and foremost a mother, and thus, I let the consideration to my son overrule any other consideration. I don’t care for having a career, that doesn’t make me happy. Being a mother does!

Then, if God wants me to have a second baby, and He thinks I’m fit and capable, then I will. But how may I know? I pray for Him to give us a second child if that’s what He wants. I’m very content with having only one, because the one is such a large and valuable gift! He’s all I ever could have wanted! He’s perfect!

I also pray for the Lord to give me the courage and strength needed to give birth to a second child, if I’m having one. My son deserves a sister or brother, and I know we have room in my family (time, love, space etc), both the small one and the more extended one. I mustn’t let my anxiety win, but I need to find out how to overcome and live with the anxiety as well. I think I would regret having only one kid, should it be due to me being afraid of giving birth and worrying too much for the future… none of my worries have been true so far, it’s due time for me trying to worry less!

A day in skirt

Some of the blogs I read have done “a week in modest dress”-things where the blog writer takes a picture of herself everyday in a week. This is Anna in Veiled Glory. That’s one of the most inspiring thing to read about, as this shows ordinary people putting their stand on modest clothing into practise. That’s one of my main current goals. Today I’ve spent the entire day in modest clothes, long sleeved shirt and long black denim skirt. It makes me feel good. My consience is good and I feel like a woman. All my skirts are either knee length or mid calf length. None are shorter. But with the knee lengths, I’m constantly checking to see that it hasn’t slipped over the knee, and when bending down, I’m thinking about how much of my legs are showing. But the most uncomfortable aspect is the need for panty-hose. I really hate wearing panty-hoses, whatever the thickness of it. I never seem to find the right size. It’s either too large or too small, or if it fits my legs, it sure doesn’t fit the rest…

Walking in the city today, I was approached by a woman from the Jehovah’s Witnesses. I got two brochures and a book called “Knowledge”. I thought I might find something inspiring for me in it. I’m not considering changing churches, I’m a convinced catholic, but that doesn’t restrain me from being inspired by other christians’ faith. Imagine the courage this woman has, walking up to complete strangers, starting to talk about God. Think about all the rejection she gets in a day of her mission. I find it sometimes hard to tell people I’m a believer… in fear of the picture they may make of me in their head. But, since becoming a mother and in my 30’s, I’m more confident and doesn’t fear this as much as I used to.

I’ve managed to keep away from chocolate and sweets today. The first days are always the worst. I have to warn my husband… because my temper is not good when quitting comfort-eating. But, it will pass, and I know I can do it, because I’ve done it before (quitting that is). And I visualise the good feeling of internal physical cleanliness I get when not eating the “forbidden” food. I can’t see myself quitting chocolate for life. I think this is the way it could be with me and my comfort-eating. I hope for the periods of non-eating to be longer than the others. And I think about how my son will see me comfort-eating, and perhaps learn from my example. That’s what I did with my mum. The food at home was always very healthy and in the right amounts, but whenever having a good time, eating sweets (chocolate, cakes, etc) was a certainity. And, she has been comfort-eating for years. But, she didn’t admit it until I told her I was doing it...

Simple life

These pictures are from a 1840 suburban cottage in Oslo. It’s reconstructed at a folk museum. These pictures fascinate me. I wonder how I would’ve liked to live in the 19th century, in a room like this. If I remember correctly, 12 people lived in these three rooms. This is a true form of minimalism. Was people happier with less earthly belongings? Or were they simply to exhausted to think about happiness? Maybe the women dreamed about bigger rooms, personal space, more clothes and shoes, less hard work…? I don’t know. Maybe I romanticise the really simple life, ignoring all the hard times, the lack of clothes, the lack of money, the lack of food perhaps, the bad health they suffered from.

This is the kitchen.

This is room no. 1. The picture above the headboard of the bed has some sort of christian saying on it.

also room no. 1

Room no. 2Room no. 3

The more one eats, the more active one should be...

Here’s a new thought to me: if eating a lot of chocolate, I should be more active than if I’m not eating chocolate or other sweets. I’ve always thought that eating chocolate is such a “crime” (to myself anyway) that I could just give up on all good intentions… but talking to my GP on Friday, she presented this new idea to me. She knows what I’m talking about, she’s a little big herself, and doesn’t condemn my imperfect actions. It’s good to finally meet a GP that isn’t using every opportunity to tell me that I’m overweight and that I should do something about it.

I don’t understand how these health professionals think… do they actually think that I’m not aware of my weight being fairly more than the recommended weight for a person my height? And do they actually think that I haven’t done or tried to do anything about it? And, do they actually think that telling me to do something about it, may help? For example, I was taking an ultrasound of my stomach area (no pregnancy), and the doctor performing the ultrasound, which lasted for 10 minutes, poked my stomach and said that since being overweight the pictures was not going to be very clear (which I knew, because I’d been taking ultrasounds when pregnant the previous year), and then she said “it’s just about going out for some more walks, you know”. Lying there, with my least favourite area uncovered, I felt really humiliated, but being an overweight person I’m used to be humiliated by health professionals. So I replied a polite “yes” and didn’t say anything more. Back in my office I first felt sad then angry. But I didn’t do anything about it. So this doctor will keep on humiliating other overweights.

I know it isn’t smart to be overweight, I’m aware of all the health risks I’m facing, but it isn’t that easy to stop eating chocolate. Comfort-eating has been (and still is) my way of comping with the traumas I suffer from. Others may use alcohol, gambling, drugs etc to cope. And I don’t tell everyone about the reason why I’ve been comfort-eating… and it shouldn’t be necessary either! I recommend all health professionals to be a little more polite and understanding in dealing with persons suffering from politically uncorrect actions (such as smoking, drugs, comfort-eating).