Following Jesus

Deuteronomy 22:5 (New International Version): "A woman must not wear men's clothing, nor a man wear women's clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this."

This passage means, to those who follow it, that women should wear skirts and dresses and men not. Inspired by several modest clothes wearing women, I've been wearing skirts everyday for some weeks, because I too believed that the Bible told me to. But the internal consequences wasn't good. I got more concerned about following this passage than doing good deeds, and it also made think judgmental thoughts about other jeans wearing women. I thought that I was somehow better than them as I followed the Lord's directions in this matter. But, while at church this Sunday, it stroke me that all these women in my church wearing jeans or pants, with short or long hair, they might actually be better Christians than me.

I talked to my husband about it. About how much of my focus and energy I've spent on following this passage and what following it has meant to me. And he said "didn't Jesus talk to the Pharisees about how they believed themselves to be more righteous because they followed every rule to detail?" He doesn't believe in God, but he can still have some wise things to say about being a Christian. And he said that Jesus surely is more focused on action than f0llowing every rule to the letter. We agreed that I can wear jeans or skirts, when I feel like it, and that I should focus my energy on following Jesus' example and His teachings about how to be a Christian.

For two days now I've been wearing jeans to work, and it feels OK. I still see the Bible passage, and know that God wants me to dress as a woman, modest and without too much focus on my appearance (more on the inside and my actions), and I still admire those who are able to wear their skirts everyday without becoming a "pharisee" about it, still able to focus on the right things, their actions and prayers. I've realized that I've sort of started in the wrong end of things... changing the outside (how I dress) didn't automatically change my inside... I need to start at the inside by changing the way I think and act, and let that be the main focus of my life.

The moral law requires all women to wear the veil on their hearts. A woman should not wear the veil on her head, until she is wearing it first on her heart. A woman who wears the veil on her heart accepts the place that God gives to women in the Church, the family, and society. Women who wear the veil on their hearts are imitating the Virgin Mary in her humility, submissiveness, and obedience to Christ. The veil should cover her head, but not her face. It is first and foremost symbolic of humility, submissiveness and obedience. From www.catholicplanet.com/women/headcovering.htm

I reckon this can work on clothing as well. And the a lot of Muslim women wear hijab and jeans/pants.

Two gods...

I'm thinking a lot about buying a new handbag for myself. I know I don't need it. I have lots of hand- and shoulderbags at home. But now this idea is fixated in my mind, and it's an internal struggle of reminding myself I don't need another handbag. I have lots of good quality, nice handbags at home. Why is it so important to me to buy new stuff when I don't need it?

13 “No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.” (Luke 16:13)

One thing I could need, is a dress or some skirts. I'm now wearing skirts everyday, and I have three long skirts that I alternate. They're all black, and it could be nice to have some with a hint of color. Perhaps brown? But I'd rather buy myself a new handbag than a piece of clothing. Why's that?

I'm finding it somewhat hard to resist buying new things. It's like all the advertising I've seen and read and heard has thaught me to constantly buy things. To constantly feel a need to buy new things. That buiyng things is normal and can satisfy my needs, define or at least help to build an image of, who I am. Most women magazines are full of both advertising and hints and tips about what to wear/use etc. Most of the items need to be bought, because one has to follow the trends. The handbag bought two years ago is so out of fashion now, because this year it's so and so and so...

And, we, the gullible readers, perhaps more or less self confident, fail to acknowledge or uncover the main reason why they're telling us to buy more things - because the producers need to earn more money! That's the main reason why the fashion industry comes up with new trends every season.

I'm trying to get off this crazy carousel of constantly needing more and different things. It's time I do what is right - by the Bible and by taking the environment in to consideration - stop buying new things when the old things functions!

Modest clothing

These are from webshops offering modest apparel. Click on the pictures for a link to the shops. I haven’t bought anything from these shops, but I very much like the clothes they’re offering.

For more thoughts, Bible passages, and so on, about modest clothing, choose “modest clothing” in the category cloud.

My favourite outfit would be the blue A-line denim skirt with the blue and white shirt for work or just a t-shirt top for other times. The floral dress would be perfect for summer, and the denim jumper dress would be perfect both winter and summer. I know the knitted cardigan isn’t the latest in fashion, but I like it.

I’ve always liked modest clothing, and was very happy in the 1990’s with the jumper and t-shirt fashion. The fashion magazines I’ve read in an attempt to know all about how to look and what to wear, have all told me that I’m supposed to dress sexy. Showing my best sides and hiding the larger parts. Plunging necklines showing some cleavage. But that’s not my style, so I’ve read these magazines, feeling more and more stupid and tragically unfashionable. But yesterday I threw all my fashion magazines in the paper recycling bin, and I’ve decided it’s time I decide what to wear. It’s no use trying to follow a fashion designed by gay men designers and shown by unnaturally thin top models. The fashion magazines likes to promote themselves as a woman’s best friend teaching what to wear and how to wear it in order to be a popular, attractive, and successfull person. The problem is that the fashion magazines are used by the fashion industry as an advertising channel in a subtle way not known to the reader. Both the fashion industry and the magazines earn money on women’s needs to be liked and approved by others. By telling “this is what you need for looking hot this summer/spring/fall/winter”, the woman thinks it’s best I follow these guides, to avoid me looking stupid. The fashion magazine editor always gets invited to the fashion shows and to the right parties, illuding that she’s an important person worth listening to. But keep in mind that the editor is only a normal person being used as a marketing channel for the fashion industry!

Feminine and modest clothes

This is some of what the Bible says about feminine and modest clothes:

Deuteronomy 22:5 (New King James Version): 5 “A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman’s garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the LORD your God.” - usually interpreted as meaning that women should dress like women and not like men, i.e. using skirts and dresses, not pants.

1 Timothy 2:8-10 (New King James Version): “that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, 10 but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.” - usually understood as meaning that women can wear gold and pearls and braided hair, but it should not be used as a means to become beautiful, it is the good works of a godly woman, and her inner self, that should be the beautification of her. It is that she should focus on, and work towards in order to distinguish herself from the rest of the world. The world was and still is, too preoccupied with a person’s looks and outer appearance.

In this last passage there’s also mentioned that the woman should wear modest clothes. What exactly is modest clothes? The interpretations differ. Does the skirt have to be at ankle length or mid-calf or slightly covering the knee? (anything shorter is considered un-modest by most) And what about the tops? Do they have to have long sleeves or is half-sleeves enough? No sleeves is considered un-modest by most) How tight or loose fitted? Can one have tailored/fitted shirts/tops showing curves or not?

There’s no official teaching/guidelines from the Catholic Church about what makes clothes modest and not. One’s asked to cover ones shoulders and wear knee-length skirts or shorts when going to church, and of course cover ones tummy, but what about everyday-life? I mean, I pray more outside church than inside, simply because most of my time is spent outside of church. If I’m to be modest inside the church where the Lord is present, I think I should be outside as well, as the Lord is present everywhere! I think it would’ve been nice if the Church made some clear guidelines all believers should follow.

I try to make my own rules, and looks at what others are saying. But, I can see a diversion in opinions everywhere. Muslims are required to cover everything but their hands and face. But some Muslims cover for example their arms with tight fitted long-sleeves T-shirts. Is that more modest than a loose-fitted t-shirt with half-sleeves? An I see many Muslims wearing trousers and jeans, perhaps that’s considered modest, I don’t know. most Christians doesn’t care much about the modesty issue, I think. A lot of young Christian females wear tight fitted t-shirts and singlets, and also have deep necklines. Only a few observe the only skirts and dresses rule. Most wear whatever the fashion dictates. You can’t see if a person is Christian or not, because she might be wearing a cross, but so might a lot of others do, because its a fashion item!

I wonder what happened in the 20th century that made women discard thousands years long traditions… For as long as people have worn clothes, it was the rule for women to wear dresses/skirts and they’ve always been ankle long. But somehow women stopped doing that, and the skirts became calf-long and then knee-long and then mini-skirts barely covering anything. And the hair could be cut short, as a man’s, and one stopped covering ones head when in public. Why? And was it all good?

Couldn’t women obtain their rights and freedom looking like a woman? Where’s the appreciation of the difference between man and woman? If God had wanted us to be the same, he’d created us the same. But He created us different so that we could fulfill each other! We’re supposed to look different, be different, excel at different things!

Easier to dress modest during autumn

I find it much easier to dress modestly now when the weather is colder, than in the midst of summer. Now I wear my knee-length summer skirts with tights underneath. Half or full sleeve blouses/tunics, and the long warmer skirts, makes a modest and comfortable wardrobe. I also have a couple of almost see-through tunics that I wear over my least modest tees. I manage to wear skirts all week when leaving the house. At home I have a couple of very comfy (but not at all stylish) sweat pants that I wear. But mainly that’s inside the house or perhaps out in the street watching my son play or when driving him to the kindergarden and following him in. I have a variety of different skirts, and I like wearing them. This is something I’ve chosen for myself, and am totally comfortable with. I like the femininity of the skirts, but also the fact that they’re not as warm as my pair of jeans.

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Today and yesterday I’ve had a light form for morning sickness… but dare I believe that it’s pregnancy related, or should I keep telling myself that this has nothing to do with me being pregnant, this is only related to my tonsillitis and the bad taste I wake up with every morning as a result of my tonsillitis being chronic. Or even my body faking pregnancy symptoms because I want it that much… Of course I really hope, and pray for, a little life starting in my womb, but as I’ve hoped for that every month since January this year, and every month becoming disappointed, I’m reluctant to hope too much. It’s better if I assume I can’t have any more babies, and then if I can, I can be happily surprised… this was somewhat easier to believe in before my first pregnancy… but now that I know I can have children naturally concieved I think that it should be possible a second time. Oh, how hard it is to wait for my period to come (or hopefully not)…

Naked

I went to a store today and wore a t-shirt with very short sleeves and jogging-trousers somewhat thight-fitted and just below the knee in length. Not an outfit I would wear going to work or to the city, but more of an at-home-outfit I use at home and when going to a store where I drive up to the door and go straight in. Comfortable clothes. Strolling through the store I suddenly saw a Muslim lady with an hijab and long sleeves and long skirt, and I felt almost naked… I felt an urgent need to go home and cover myself somewhat more. If I had wore a t-shirt with half sleeves and a long skirt, I doubt that I would’ve felt the same nakedness.

I’m not a muslim, and I don’t feel a need (or calling) to cover that much, but seeing the Muslim woman and feeling the nakedness - it made me think about which one of us is the most liberated woman… me dressing in fitted clothing showing all my bumps and lumps and bare arms, or her covered and modest, hiding her body under loose fitted clothing. I know that I didn’t feel good in the clothes I wore, all though they were comfortable (stretchable material).

I feel it is due time I start to wear more modest clothing, thus practicing what I believe is true… But a problem arises - what to do with the half-modest clothes I already have? I can’t afford to give away almost all of my clothes in order to buy new more modest ones. Almost all my skirts are just below the knee, and my t-shirts are tight fitting, because I’ve tried to look smaller by not hiding myself under large “tents”… Have I felt comfortable? No - because I’ve been very body conscious, and disliked myself because of my stomach, large breasts and generally large body… And I have probably attracted attention to my body by wearing these clothes.

Can wearing thights under the knee-length skirt make the outfit modest?